Wednesday, March 30, 2011

RE: a strange thing happened to me on my way back from the auditorium.....

Had rather an odd romantic encounter last night, while teaching at Springfeild campus. Teaching always brings out the extrovert in me and so when I got into the lift alone and it spoke to me, a conversation ensued. “Going down” it purred in a sultry female voice I suspect is wasted in a lift. “What?” I replied, “that’s rather forward of you isn’t it? You haven’t even asked where I’m trying to go? Or was that meant to be suggestive? In which case I’m not sure I should push your buttons, I don’t want to lead you on. After all and it could never work between us, me being a Homosapian and you being a lift…. “ The lift sat mute, motionless, ignoring me…. “Your ignoring me now aren’t you, I’ve hurt your feelings….Oh dear, why is it always the unsuitable ones that show an interest. “ Yep she was definitely ignoring me now… not a word “Oh alright then, I’ll gently press the button for the ground floor, but please don’t interpret this as anything untoward… I mean you’re a lovely lift but I’ll admit I’d never thought of trying a meaningful relationship with an inanimate object….” Thankfully the lift now swiftly descended to level one and as I waited for the door to open, I wished the lift a nice night and all the best in its quest for love. Such situations are awkward after all and rejection can be a blow for a lonely lift no one talks too…. The lift seemed encouraged and she said “first floor” in much the same friendly voice she’d started in. The doors opened and the waiting student gave me a WTF??? look that made it clear the lift isn’t soundproof…..oops. I gave the student a cheery smile and added in passing, “Be gentle with her, she’s had rather a rough night!” lol. Must admit as I walked across the car park it was hard not to laugh, the look on the students face was priceless!!!!

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